always watching

I've always been a people watcher. I'm curious about those around me. I have based many of my decisions on the experiences I've seen others have, both good and bad.
In 4th grade I remember Mr. Asbury, my teacher, getting after a boy in my class for cussing at Field Day. Note to self: don't cuss.
A friend "borrowed" a car in 9th grade, drove it, and promptly crashed it.
Note to self: don't steal cars and drive prior to 16.
For as long as I can remember I have watched my sweet mom as a wife and a mother. I've watched her rub my dad's neck in the car while he drives, tickle his hand as they watch tv, and happily put together a dinner just for him after a late night at work or church.
I have watched her clean, cook, decorate, drive to and from practices, cheer the loudest at games, laugh, support, and love us.
I remember going to the MTC (missionary training center) with Mom and Grandma so they could teach the outgoing Sister missionaries how to appropriately apply makeup, pluck their eyebrows, shave/wax/bleach their mustaches, and behave like ladies. Oh boy did I think they were amazing! If they were asked to teach the Sisters, they must really be great! ...and I must be something special to be there with them...
I watched my grandmothers happily love and care for their children and grandchildren; finding their greatest joy through their families, just like my mom.

I have always known I wanted to be a wife and mother. Always. I used to picture myself as a cute, young mom pushing a stroller or pulling a wagon, knowing that that stroller and that wagon would someday be filled with the world's most beautiful babies.

I watched my grandmothers age gracefully as they continuously loved and treasured their families.
I now "watch" my parents adjust to life without a child or grandchild in their state. Dad wants to know what he did to deserve a life with all the kids thousands of miles away.

Sure there are mundane tasks associated with motherhood as a stay-at-home mom (floors that always seem to be dusty, sinks inevitably filled with bits of toothpaste, hairties galore, flip flops here, there, and everywhere). But I can honestly say I would not change positions with anyone, anywhere. I don't desire a career. I don't desire riches or wealth untold. My greatest treasure is my family.

This morning as I told Kenne "bye" I told her I might not see her again today (she has school till 3:30 and swim practice till 5:30 and I have to be at a Young Women meeting by 5 and most likely won't be home till 9). She said, "Mom, can I just skip swim today?" I said, "No, why?" She said, "Because I want to be with you before I go to bed tonight." What a doll! I'm so thankful that today is the exception not the rule.

As this world shifts and women continuously pursue higher and higher degrees of education and career opportunities before family I wonder how our culture will change. Who is thinking about the children? Who will raise the children? Who will wipe away their tears? Who will sing to them? Who will pray with them? Who will teach them right and wrong?

"Mother, do you love me? Mother, will you care for me? Even if I turn away, or disobey, or go astray, then will you love me still? Mother, will you teach me? Mother, help me choose the right. When I do not understand the Lord's command, please take my hand and lead me safely with his light. I need your love, I need your light to show me how to be like Jesus. The Savior's love will light the path to lead me safely home.

"Oh yes, my child, I love you. My child, I'll always care for you. And with the Savior as our guide, I'll share the light I feel inside, and you will feel his love for you. Oh yes, my child, I'll teach you. My child, I'll help you choose the right. And when you do not understand the Lord's command, I'll take your hand, and he will lead us safely home."